Someone posed the question whether divorce was morally wrong and I found myself stumped for a few seconds. Finally my answer was, “that is a personal question that only you can answer for yourself.”
I hate it when people try to dispense their morality onto other people. I also hate it when people try to take the moral high ground while trying to make somebody else seem immoral for one reason or the other.
If you are someone from the Judeo-Christian tradition, you probably have been, like I have, indoctrinated to believe that marriage is forever.
The fact is, that marriages in the time that the Bible was written, were very different from what marriage is today. First of all, most men were polygamous. They were allowed by religios doctrine, to have as many wives as they had cattle to feed. Were those forever marriages? Maybe. Was every body happy? Perhaps? Was everything honky dory? Possibly.
But what does that have to do with marriages today which are creatures of legislative contruction by and large? That is not to say that people are not getting married in their churches with their religions playing a huge role in their decision. But the fact is, you don’t need a judge to end a church marriage. You need a judge to end a state marriage.
In New York as well as around the world, marriage is really nothing more than a contract. It is a legal agreement between two people to live together, procreate, build a financial partnership, and otherwise share their lives. Sometimes this model works out and sometimes it does not work out, and people want out of the contract. Why should anyone be able to force people to stay in a contractual relationship that is no longer fullfilling it’s purpose, if they want out? Why should they be burdened with issues of morality and whether divorce is or is not immoral?
I have my own personal views about marriage but I don’t see what my opinion and personal morality have to do with it if two people decide they want to get a divorce from their marriage. What business is it of mine?
I don’t think that is any one else’s call but the two people in the marriage. I do not think anybody else’s morality should come into it. In fact, for those moral high-grounders, I say, sit down and think about your own personal issues and whether your actions have comported with your own moral standards one hundred percent of the time.
If it hasn’t, you should not cast stones.