BAHAMAS: Is the Tiger and Elin Woods divorce a hoax?

Is the divorce off? The Huffington Post is reporting that not only is Elin not likely to divorce Tiger anytime soon, she is possibly miffed about reports that the “divorce is 100% on” as reported by ABC and a bunch of other reputable sources last week. On top of that, homeboy’s yacht, PRIVACY, has reportedly left the marina where it was docked in Florida and taken to the high seas. Speculation is rampant he’s off to the Bahamas with friends. Question: Are Elin and the kids on board?
If so, then this divorce has been one big hoax and the joke is on the media and the bloggers. Not us, of course. We never believed the divorce rumors anyway. We did what? 2 posts on this story? We knew better than to get caught up in this divorce melee of Tiger’s and Elin’s. We were the only ones who did not give unsolicited advice to these folks. So we feel good. We feel smart. 🙂
Listen, we wish Tiger and Elin the best. Are we bullish on this marriage lasting till their 10 year anniversary? No, we are not going to lie. But if Tiger had good reasons/excuses for his debauchery, such as an unintended addiction to human growth hormone and pain killers that ramped up his sex drive, if he did, then Elin might be able to find it in her heart to give him another chance. I mean, seriously, woman to woman, I would ask Elin, “what are you going to trade him in for? A man who doesn’t cheat? or one who just cheats with one woman?”  Where do you find such a specimen? If he doesn’t do it physically he does it in his mind and heart which is infinitely more sinful. Because he covets and he pines and he lasciviously desires but he pretends to be a good guy and so he’s just a hypocrite.
Besides, if Elin dumps Tiger today, by tomorrow hundreds of blondes will be lined up to bag him. And bag him one of them will. As in spouse. Wife. Whatever you want to call it. Whose loss is it? There are millions of Elins where she came from. But Elin can’t easily find another Tiger Woods. And forget this fantasy that Tiger is finished as a golfer and high-earning endorser. When the dust settles with this mess? He’s coming back bigger and better and richer. First of all, he could write his own tell all book about this situation. If I were him, I’d keep that strategy going where I kept my mouth shut and let everybody else run theirs. Then a year from now, I come out with my story. That’s a $100 million advance right there from Random House for that shizzo. Then with his new wife, he has four more kids. And before you know it, it will be like “Elin who?” Those are the facts, ma’am. So if she stays? She’s a smart cookie. And a tough one.
Yep. If Tiger is contrite and wants to try to work out the marriage, I would commend them for trying. Marriage is hard and messy and heart-breaking. But that’s why it’s called marriage. It’s an institution, damn it. And folks, more folks, need to remember that and stop running to their divorce lawyer at the drop of a hat. For better or for worse. Till death. Remember?
Of course, if this whole thing was not a hoax and they do in fact go ahead and get divorced, we are not surprised either. Because this marriage has been severely strained by these developments.
And that’s what’s up.