On divorcing the hoarder: is this an irreconcilable difference?

My good friend and I were talking over tennis (my new passion) the other day and this issue of hoarding stuff came up. Her current boyfriend, who is helping her with her divorce from her husband, is a big time hoarder and he’s brought all this stuff to her home and packed them up in her garage, basement and in law suite without her permission and she’s panicked about how that might impact her custody of her children if Child Welfare Services pops in for a surprise visit.
Well, as I told her, chances are, Child Welfare Services won’t have a huge sense of humor with children living in an environment that is, for lack of a better word, unsanitary; and a lot of times, if not always, hoarders end up living in a situation that is mentally and physically and psychologically unsanitary. Believe it or not, after my conversation with her, I stumbled upon an episode of Hoarders on A&E and my mouth was just agape. I could not believe some of the stories that I saw, I couldn’t believe the filth and chaos that some hoarders have amassed for their children to live in: the squalor, rat droppings, mountain of boxes, dirty laundry, you name it. Incredible.
But it was interesting to note the impact this behavior had on the hoarders themselves. One guy resorted to alcoholism. He suffered from depression and even tried to commit suicide. His wife was also depressed and the children were a mess. One poor kid couldn’t even have a sleep over play date because what parent would allow their child to sleep over in the stinking mess that the hoarders depicted in the episode had created? I’ve never seen anything like it. It was shocking, really, that so called “sane” people can live like that.
It was interesting to see how attached these people were to their junk and remnants of their past. It is clearly an illness. These folks need help. A lot of help.  It is easy to see how this behavior can lead to isolation, desperation, depression, anger, resentment and, yes, divorce. And how it can completely mess up the kids who have to live in this filth that had nothing to do with them.  But how bizarre the way an entire family can become so totally co-dependent on this chaos, how they all hold on to it, like a weird crutch. But if for no other reason, parties should divorce this relationship to save the children. Because most often than not, even after you clean this mess up, it will be accumulated again. This is not a situation that can be reconciled and nothing can come of it but a loss of custody of your children.