Be a better husband or wife and avoid divorce, darlings!
I don’t think I need to elaborate too much on this post since I am sure any one of the two people who actually reads it will be able to deduce what it means to be a better husband or a better wife. I mean, it’s the usual stuff: be sensitive to your partner, be patient with your partner, forgive your partner as many times as you humanly can, practice a little kindness to your partner and others, laugh, have as much sex as possible, don’t cheat, pull your weight in the relationship and in the marriage and in the home, don’t keep score, take care of you so that you are the best you that you can be (watch your weight and all that good stuff), have a sense of adventure, don’t impose your vices on your partner, try to get along with the in laws, don’t force the in laws down your partner’s throat if the in laws don’t like your spouse, keep dating, bathe and use deodorant, shave, don’t spend all the household income on frivolous nonsense, grow up, and all that stuff.
Look, why am I giving this advice anyways? What the bleep do I know about this stuff??? I’m single! Ok? I’m paradigmatically bloated and I can’t focus on anything even though I’m just trying to write a blog here! And pulling stuff out of my….whatever. I am loathing myself at the moment, sorry…..argghhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ok. I’ve composed myself. Forgive my outburst. I just have a lot going on and I’m spazzing out and then, I feel a little fat so…..So, yea. Be a better spouse and you will avoid divorce. Okay? It’s that simple. You don’t have to be married or a rocket scientist to figure that out. It’s like, duh.