Falling out of love: when your marriage hits a skid can you avert divorce?

I fell out of love with someone the other day. It was pretty intense so I had to talk to god about it. It was like,

Me: Dear God, it’s me, Admin

God: Yes, Admin, what do you want?

Me: Well, I sort of fell out of love with someone and it really hurts.

God: Okay. And so how can I help you with this? What can I do that I haven’t already done?

Me: Well, I just feel like, why do you allow me to get these stoopid crushes on people all the time?

God: I allow you to get stoopid crushes on people?

Me: Yes! Why?!

God: Admin, I do not allow you to get stoopid crushes on people; you do that yourself.

Me: Well, if you loved me you’d help me to stop.

God: Admin, what is the definition of insanity?

Me: Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result

God: Okay then. So what’s the problem? What part of that are you having trouble processing?

Me: Well, I’m insane! Help me!

God: You know what Admin? I’ve got my hands full with these boys in the Middle East. I just can’t deal with the drama right now. You’re a fricking drama queen!

Me: I can’t help it.

God: Admin, can we take this up another time?

Me: No! No! I want to talk about it right now!

God: Jesus, Mary and Joseph. I just don’t know what else to do with this girl!

hahahahahaha 🙂 This went on a while till, well, I agreed to let him go see what Muamar and the Libyans are doing and so I could sort things out for myself……

Falling in love is the sweetest thing, isn’t it? You love everything about the person from the way they pronounce a certain word, to the way they walk, to the way they smell, just everything. But then, something happens, and it’s almost like overnight, love starts to slip away. I mean, sometimes it’s a gradual process where you realize, heck, this person is annoying me. But other times, it’s abrupt and sudden and you don’t know how to get that lovey dovey feeling again.

This is something I understand only too well. Cause I’m always in love. And then, just as suddenly as I fall in love, he does something and I’m just like “ugh. I hate him. He sucks. I never want to see him again.”  And I know it’s ridiculous and that it’s immature and just ridiculous. At my age, someone should absolutely cane me for being so damned ridiculous and then I go to god to talk about it and he just throws his hands up in despair.  Hahaha (smiley face )
What if you’ve married this person and you totally used to love this person and then you wake up one day and you look at this person and you realize, “heck, I don’t love this person anymore. She sucks!” Then what? Is divorce inevitable? I don’t think so necessarily. I think that some marriages can be salvaged because it’s not like it’s realistic to expect to feel this heart-fluttering infatuation forever. Real life kicks in and things happen and you get disappointed by someone and you get hurt and you also do your own share of damage to a relationship and it’s quite natural to wonder, “heck, is this worth it? Do I really need to be here? Or can I do better?”
Sometimes you can do better and you should divorce yourself from the situation, for sure. Other times, it may be worth it to work through the skid and try to recapture the “lovey dovey” feeling. How? Well, by communicating with each other and being open and honest and saying, “you know what? you used to be such and such but now I feel like you are taking me for granted and I feel neglected and I feel hurt and I really need more than I am getting from you and from this relationship right now…..”
It just all depends on each individual couple and what is at the root of the discontent. It’s usually because someone is feeling neglected or hurt or taken for granted. Sometimes, it’s worse than that and a divorce may be the absolute only recourse and there is no averting it.
But it sure is sad, isn’t it? Falling out of love….