When a spouse "withdraws" rather than confronts issues…

Hello darlings! I’m fighting the worse migraine I’ve had in a while, so while I wait for it to pass, (so that I can get some serious work done)  I thought I’d come to the Saloon and write a quick post. A few hours back I was listening to a “spiritual” radio program I really enjoy and they were talking about marriage, and about when spouses “withdraw” and how destructive that is to a relationship and a marriage. And that really resonated, because it is what I do when I am upset. I withdraw, I shut down. I stop communicating. I’ve always known that this is terrible. But I’ve said to myself that I would only marry someone who won’t allow me to behave in this way; I would only marry someone who doesn’t tolerate my awful silences and withdrawals. But I didn’t think that other people do that as well. And according to the guy who I was listening to, he said that mostly men do this. They just shut down. And they do that enough times and their wives gets a toy boy who “listens.” And next thing you know, the marriage is on the rocks.
…..omg, I have such a terrible headache! What if I pass out in here???…….
So, ok. Let me focus. I really want to start to work on my thesis. It’s time to do that. But this headache…I can barely blog…so what is the topic? Oh. Yes. Withdrawing. This is bad, as I said. It is hardly ever the right choice. I think sometimes it might be better to temporarily take a time out than blow your gasket and get yourself in trouble; but most times, when you shut down and you shut out your spouse, it really isn’t a good thing.
That’s it for this post. I think. I need aspirins. Hope I didn’t have too many typos.  Just wanted to remind you guys not to just withdraw from each other. Talk. Always talk, even if you yell sometimes. It’s better than silence most of the time. 🙂
Ciao!