Is Tom Cruise a bad father? Katie Holmes may want everyone to think so
The news of the Holmes/Cruise break up was hard to digest. They seemed so much like a match made in Science. Over here, we have been speculating off the charts about what the real reason for the divorce is. Was he a bad lover, for example? We doubt it. He seems very intense. Katie was much too smitten in the beginning for him to have been a bad lover. She was practically screaming in delight on talk shows about how he buys her presents and what not. Of course, presents are not lovemaking. Only an aphrodisiac in certain narrow circumstances–and then only initially. That wears off quick. So the fact that she was happy about the diamonds and pearls initially do not mean he was ever a good lover. Only a great gift-giver. So we think, yes, it is possible this was about the boudoir.
Along that vein, there have been persistent rumors that the couple have engaged in unusual practices. None of these rumors are credible, but they exist, and so maybe these caused a rift? Are they still friends with Will and Jada Pinkett Smith? Will and Jada were also rumored to be on the rocks. But they seem to have a much more resilient marriage than most people can understand or believe to be true. The foursome supposedly went on all these double dates.
Was it that Tom had a Napoleon complex? We know that Katie towered over her man by at least 4 inches. He seems to enjoy the company of tall women and loves to marry them, too. And short men can be sexy. But they can also be domineering and controlling and angry and hard to live with. Was Tom like that? There are signs he could have been. He insisted on changing her name, her religion, so much about her. I clearly remember him saying during an interview when Katie tried to say that she can be both Catholic and Scientologist at the same time, he said: “WE ARE SCIENTOLOGISTS.” That told me a lot. He was in charge. He made the decisions. He controlled her. She did not have a say in who she was. This can be very problematic.
But then again, it could have been about work. Tom seems a workaholic and he seems like he is never home. This could be perception. But we have pointed out ad nauseum on this blog that workaholics do not make good spouses. Now, Tom may have been working extra hard just so he could bring home the bacon and pay for all the trappings that comes with the movie star lifestyle like his private plane and more than five homes around the world. But he could have been using work to avoid Katie and avoid intimacy. Furthermore, she may have been unhappy with what marriage to Tom did to her career, which must have been the opposite of what she thought it would when she did her calculus and decided to marry the mega-star. She thought he would be a gravy train.
Oh, but wait. Was it the couch? No, not Oprah’s couch. But maybe one or the both of them was getting psychoanalysis and the whole thing became untenable? Bruce Springsteen has copped to getting analysis for the past 3o years and it kept his marriage together but not everyone is so fortunate. Psychoanalysis can strain a marriage. But then again, the thing with Oprah’s couch could have been an issue too. That could not have been easy behind closed doors dealing with the fall out from that. Very embarrassing. For Tom and Katie. But also the collectif was so negative for the marriage and the love, they probably didn’t stand a prayer, knew it before they even married, but went ahead anyway to save face knowing the divorce would happen sooner rather than later.
Tom is not stupid. I bet he had an air tight prenup drawn up and Katie thought she needed the marriage so badly, she signed. No problem.
But then again, this could have been about religion, too. Tom, as everyone knows, is an avid and staunch believer that God is a scientist. Actually, it is unclear what the doctrinal beliefs of Scientology are. So strike that last statement. But it is highly probably that religious squabbles were at the root of the couple’s issues since Katie is Roman Catholic and it is very telling that as soon as they divorced, she re-registered as a Roman Catholic and according to some sources she signed up little Suri in a Catholic school.
The Suri factor is interesting because it almost seems like Katie wants it to look like dressing up Suri in all those age inappropriate outfits was Tom’s idea and that seems somewhat false. Tom has his issues but it is highly doubtful he had the time or inclination to dictate what his infant daughter should wear — including lipstick, expensive handbags and high heels. That is mommy terrain 100%. That is what mothers do. They dress up their daughters and put them in beauty pageants and paint their nails, toes and lips. To try to make it look like it was all Tom’s idea seems a bit devious. Katie knows that she will get all the sympathy and the goodwill with this divorce and so Tom has no choice but to play nice and roll over to give her what she wants. And if that is the penance he pays for the Oprah incident, fine. But to try to make everyone feel he was a bad influence on Suri by selecting all those inappropriate outfits? Come on Katie. Who do you think you are talking to with that? It’s one thing to say he was an awful husband. But it is clear he is a wonderful father and that Suri adores him. It is also clear that the outfits and make up and high heels were your idea. So making this sudden announcement that Suri is not going to be wearing designer clothes right after you announce divorce is a catty way to get people to villify your ex and that is not very “innocent” of you, Mrs. Cruise. Just saying.
But still, I feel bad for the two of you that this marriage didn’t work.