Can stubborn post-baby weight wreck your marriage?


Will your marriage rest on you losing the weight?

Recently, celeb trainer extraordinaire Traci Anderson who created the Traci Anderson Method workout plan that resculpted the bods of celebs like Gwyneth Paltrow, Madonna and Jennifer Lopez, as well as Nicole Richie and Courteney Cox, came under fire for saying “a lot of women use pregnancy as an excuse to let themselves go.” Traci went on to boast that she lost her baby weight in under six weeks and that she only gained about 30 pounds during the pregnancy. Women the world over cried foul. “How could she be so ‘stupid'” wrote one commenter on a popular gossip blog. “Women have all sorts of reasons why they may have trouble losing the baby fat. Everyone is different.”
Point taken. Traci should have been more sensitive to that fact that a lot of women are sensitive about stubborn post-baby fat. The fact that she was disciplined enough to keep the weight gain under control and then to lose the little bit she did gain, is a testament to her tremendous self-control but she should not have assumed that everyone is equally as motivated and driven. Everybody knows that pregnancy is hard and it takes a massive toll on a woman’s body.
But on the other hand, does Traci have a point? Do some women use pregnancy as an excuse to pig out? And even if they don’t exactly use it as an excuse, could the end result of all that unfortunate hormonal change wreak havoc on their marriages in at least some instances? That is to say, could it lead to divorce in at least some instances? Are there husbands who think the way Traci Anderson does that their wives used the pregnancy as an excuse to “let themselves go” and thus, tune out from their wives and go out to the pasture to seek leaner, toner mates?
And if so, what is the solution? It is easy to tell a woman, “don’t gain too much weight when you get pregnant; control yourself; control your eating.” But it could be harder said than done for some women to keep a lid on it during such an emotionally and physically charged time. It is unfair to judge a woman so harshly and put pressure on her to lose the weight in a particular amount of time. But the reality is, many guys do get turned off when their wife is lugging around 50 or more pounds more than she normally does. And what Traci is probably trying to say to women, is “yes, it’s hard to stay in control; but I did and so can you. It takes work and willpower. But you don’t have to give into the impulse to overeat just because you are pregnant. There is life after the pregnancy and just like you wouldn’t overeat when you are not pregnant, you shouldn’t overeat just because you are. Control yourself.”
That is the only solution, really. Self-control during the pregnancy. It literally could mean having a husband after the pregnancy, or not.