LIFE: Is it time to call a divorce attorney? Test Yourself!

Is it time to call the Divorce Attorney ?

We have compiled this list of 25 questions based on our experience with divorcing couples. Answer the questions below as honestly and objectively as you can. This quiz is copyright protected. Please do not reprint or distribute it without the express permission of Divorce Saloon.

 1. Does your spouse annoy you?

  • Yes, as a general rule and I am fed up (4 points)
  • Sometimes but it’s no big deal (3 points)
  • No, hardly ever (2 points)
  • Never (0 points)

2. How many times have you had marriage counseling in the last 10 years?

  • Why waste time and money? (4 points)
  • A couple of times (2 points)
  • Regularly (0 points)
  • Never (3 points)

3. Are you afraid of your spouse?

  • Of course not, don’t be ridiculous (2 points)
  • Yes, I am petrified (4 points)
  • No (0 points)
  • Sometimes but under very specific and controlled circumstances  (3 points)

4. Is your spouse ugly?

  • Yes, he/she is batsh””t hideous (4 points)
  • No my spouse is gorgeous (0 points)
  • I can’t answer that question, please dont ask (3 points)
  • Sometimes (2 points)

5. Is your spouse basically useless?

  • Yes (4 points)
  • No, what an awful thought! (2 points)
  • No (0 points)
  • Yes, but I still love him/her (3 points)

6. Do you ever secretly wish that your spouse would just die already or disappear?

  • OMG what a sick question! I don’t even know what to say!(2 points)
  • Yes, but this is a deep dark secret (4 points)
  • No, it never crossed my mind (0 points)
  • Sometimes, if I can be honest but only because my spouse sucks so royally (3 points)

7. Have you ever been the victim of domestic violence at the hands of your spouse?

  • Yes (3 points)
  • No (0 points)
  • Yes but it was my fault (4 points)
  • No, not exactly (2 points)

8. Is either you or your spouse a heavy drug or alcohol user?

  • Yes, my spouse has a serious drug problem (4 points)
  • Yes, I have a serious drug problem (4 points)
  • Yes we are both struggling with substance abuse (4 points)
  • No comment (4 points)

9. Do you like the way your spouse smells?

  • I have no idea how to begin to even answer that question! (3 points)
  • I have always loved the way my spouse smells and I still do (0 points)
  • To be honest, no I don’t (4 points)
  • Not anymore but I used to think my spouse had a sweet smell. (2 points)

10. Do you and your spouse still sleep in the same bed?

  • Yes, of course! (0 points)
  • I am not even sure how to answer this. It depends on what you mean, I guess. (2 points)
  • No but this is very recent (3 points)
  • We stopped sleeping in the same bed over a year ago and I love it actually. (4 points)

11. Do you like to kiss your spouse?

  • Yuck, kissing this person makes me feel nauseous (4 points)
  • I am indifferent, actually (3 points)
  • Yes my spouse is a great kisser (0 points)
  • God, you really ask some tough questions. I don’t know! (2 points)

12. How often do you have sex with your spouse?

  • Everyday (0 points)
  • Once per week (2 points)
  • Once per year (4 points)
  • Sex? What’s that? (3 points)

13. Are you cheating on your spouse right now with someone you like better than your spouse?

  • No, I am cheating but I like my spouse better (2 points)
  • No I am not cheating (0 points)
  • Yes I am cheating and I like my lover better…It is very, very complicated. (4 point)
  • No, I ended the affair but I like the other person better (3 points)

14. Is either you or your spouse suffering from a serious illness?

  • No we are both in optimal health (0 points)
  • I don’t have a clue (2 points)
  • Yes, I am (3 points)
  • Yes my spouse is (points)

15. Have all your friends been divorcing lately?

  • Yes, and this worries me (3 points)
  • Yes and it has put a strain on my marriage (4 points)
  • Yes but it has nothing to do with my marriage (0 points)
  • Yes it is an epidemic (2 points)

16. How would you describe the state of your marriage?

  • Happy (0 points)
  • Sad (3 points)
  • So so (2 points)
  • Dangerous (4 points)

17. Do you have kids?

  • Yes and they are a joy for me and my spouse (0 points)
  • Yes and they are a source of friction for me and my spouse (3 points)
  • No and this is an issue between us (4 points)
  • No and neither of us wants kids (2 points)

18. How is your sex life, honestly?

  • Glorious! (0 points)
  • Miserable (4 points)
  • So so (2 points)
  • Non existent (3 points)

19. Do you and your spouse share joint assets?

  • No and we have an air tight prenup. (3 points)
  • Yes everything is joint (0 points)
  • Yes some things are joint (2 points)
  • Are you crazy? Do you think I am? Of course everything is separate. (4 points)

20. Who handles money in your marriage?

  • I do (2 points)
  • My spouse does (3 points)
  • We do together (0 points)
  • We don’t have any money to handle (4 points)

21. Is your spouse capable of stealing money from you?

  • No (0 points)
  • I don’t know (3 points)
  • Yes, without batting an eye lash (4 points)
  • Of course not (2 points)

22. Do you contribute financially to the marriage?

  • Yes both me and my spouse work (2 points)
  • No I am the stay at home spouse and this is my contribution (3 points)
  • Yes both my spouse and I share the financial obligations equally (0 points)
  • No (4 points)

23. Do either you or your spouse have very traditional views of marriage and divorce?

  • Yes we both do and neither believes in divorce (0 points)
  • Yes but if necessary we both would divorce (2 points)
  • No we are not religious or traditional (4 points)
  • Only one of us is religious and traditional in these views. (3 points)

24. Is there any vast difference between you and your spouse such as age, race, social status or religion?

  • Yes we have many differences in more than one area (4 points)
  • No our differences are what attracted us to each other and keeps us together. (2 points)
  • No we are pretty much the same in the key areas (0 points)
  • Yes, we have vast differences between us but only in one area (3 points)

 

25. Do your families get along with each other?

  • No not very well and recently the problems have escalated (4 points)
  • No not at all but what else is new (3 points)
  • Yes we are a very compatible blended bunch (0 points)
  • Yes and no it depends on the day and other factors (2 points)

foto: flickr creative commons

0-25 points you could be delusional

25-50 points Green light for your marriage

50-75 points yellow light of caution

75 – 100 points call the divorce attorney

 

Quiz #1
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