How to have an enviably happy marriage

How to have an enviably happy marriage & avoid divorce
Travel to exotic places (cruise the Panama Canal, go to Machu Picchu, Cruise the Mediteranean, Go see Antartica, visit Nepal, backpack through the Rockies…)
Do fun things (skydive together, take wine-tasting classes, learn a language, go ball-room dancing, try scuba diving…)
But stay home a lot too, near the hearth, reading quietly together; it’s about balance.
Continue to date till you croak; be 22 till you die
Be best friends (protect each other, take care of each other, defend each other, be there for each other, support each other)
Fight, but don’t hold on to grudges
Make the most mundane things (like eating cheese) an event
Laugh at each other’s jokes; be genuinely amused with each other (if you are not amused with each other, don’t marry in the first place)
Don’t fight in public
Don’t call each other names, even in private
Never bad mouth each other even to best friends
Work on having a great sex life (and this does not have to mean intercourse)
Practice good hygiene out of a sense of consideration (if you can’t do it for yourself)
Take frequent weekend trips just the two of you
Go out for meals, especially breakfast dates (these are cheaper) as often as you can afford
Hold hands when you walk
Send out the message that you love each other and are a team to the rest of the world by how you act
Never cheat on each other
Don’t have kids
Support each other’s careers
Buy a scooter and get on it together for Sunday afternoon country frolics
Get along with the in laws or move far away from them
Share mutual friends
Smile when you talk to each other (and look into each other’s eyes) as a matter of routine
Consult each other before making any decision (even small decisions should be made after consulting each other)
Work out together (join a gym or go jogging, or engage in physical activity as a team)
Attend church or other spiritual events together
Flirt like the French (but only with each other)
Finish each other’s thoughts….that comes from being in sync
Keep a certain degree of mystique and mystery between yourselves
Be slightly predictably unpredictable
Use your sense of touch a lot to keep your connection…example, when talking to each other look into each others eyes, but also use touch to really communicate, even when in public. But this is about discreet touching on the arm or something like that. Nothing obscene in public. Obscenity only makes you look ridiculous it doesn’t make people envy you.
 
Originally published January 2 2012 last updated August 20 2014