Is Your Marriage in Crisis?

Marriages ebb and flow. Nobody gets to their tenth and twenty-fifth and fiftieth anniversaries without a whole lot of ebbing and a whole lot of flowing.
The trouble is that this younger generation of married folks seem to think it should be easy. They want the results without being willing to put in the time, patience, forgiveness, communication, kindness and sheer grit that is required to sustain a marriage.  The first sign of a crisis, they run.
What about you? Is your marriage in crisis right now? It probably is otherwise you probably would not be reading this post which you probably found after you googled “marriage in crisis” right?
Well, the only thing I can advise you is to pause and take stock of where you are right now in your marriage, how you got there, and where you want to be and how you are going to get there (and maybe even in how much time).
If you have the resources, consider a marriage retreat in a nice locale like Maui, Hawaii. There are some beautiful retreats in Hawaii for couples. One is at Scott River Lodge and it looks just lovely. According to their website their whole aim is to allow you to achieve a balance between rest and adventure so that you can rediscover yourself and your spouse in a peaceful, unforced way.
There are many others all over the country, of course.
But even if you cannot afford a retreat, when your marriage is in crisis, the first step is not necessarily to call your divorce attorney – this is the last step. And just because you imagine you have done everything you can does not mean you have and that you have reached the last step.
It is always important to try one last thing one last time before you pull the plug.
Of course, some marriages never should have happened to begin with. Some marriages are beyond crisis and were out of that starting gate and there is nothing that can be salvaged. It is a personal judgment. This post is not to cast judgment and talk at anyone or try to suggest there is a one size fits all solution to a crisis – such as go on retreat in Maui Hawaii. Clearly this will not be a solution for everyone. It really is just saying that sometimes, even when you have a crisis in your marriage, it does not necessarily have to mean the end. You may just need to regroup.