On the Aimless, Jobless Wife


I am not a sexist guy contrary to what my friends here at Saloon will have everybody believe. But I am fed up with the double standards in society where men are always the heavy and women are these victims who need all this protection from authorities. The fact is that in my experience I have met a lot of evil women who tried to destroy their husbands and keep him out of his children’s lives.

Recently, we had a group discussion about alimony and how I feel there is a double standard with that. Women are happy to receive all this money after they get divorced and they fight to get as much as possible for as long as possible. But then the same women turn around and say that a man who gets alimony is somehow not a manly man. One of my colleagues even said he is a “gigolo.” The whole reason I got interested in Father’s rights issues is because of all these double standards.

The other day, I think it was yesterday, I saw a post by one of my colleagues about the “jobless, aimless husband” and I just thought I couldn’t just let that go so I decided to answer it with this post about the jobless, aimless wife. I understand her post was based on an article or something in the Washington Post by this author named Carolyn Hax who wrote this piece about this woman whose “breadwinner” role in her marriage seemed to be a huge burden. And so I am not condemning Kate who wrote the opinion piece for Divorce Saloon in response to that. Kate is a very nice girl and we get along great and she knows me and that my bark is worse than my bite.

But with respect to a lot of these posts and just overall what I read on other blogs on divorce, I am fed up. I just think the article was a sexist piece of garbage and I want to be frank. I am getting too old to mince my words nowadays.

There are so many women out there who don’t have a job and happily remain a financial burden to their husbands and nobody is branding them “jobless and aimless.” They sit at home all day eating and talking with friends and they call themselves housewives or whatever and they spend money like it is water and nobody calls them jobless and aimless. And just to be clear, obviously I am not talking about ALL women because I am fully aware that a lot of women have jobs, like my own wife she works and pulls her weight in the home.

But there are a lot of women, so called “housewives” who don’t do anything all day long and then when they divorce, they claim that they stayed home and helped their husband build his career and so they are entitled to half his income and half his money and they want life long alimony for that. It’s unconscionable as far as I am concerned.

In this day and age I don’t think there is any excuse for any woman to stay home being “jobless” and “aimless.” They should go to work and pull their weight and help their husbands pay for stuff. It is both ways. Husbands and wives. If either is aimless or jobless it’s a problem. Equally. And they are both responsible for the divorce if it happens. And neither should try to creme the other for alimony in that situation.

Hey, that was just my two cents, take it or leave it.