20 Hard-Hitting Tactics to Use in Divorce


So a few years ago, I wrote a piece called Dirty Divorce Tricks and How to Beat Your Wives at their own game for Divorce Saloon. It is one of our most popular posts over the years but a lot of women do get angry about it and have sent emails to say so. I understand why, but, look, I stand by the piece.
Hard hitting tactics to use in divorce¬† is more gender neutral. I am writing it for anyone who feels they are getting a bum deal in divorce court. Probably at least half the tips could get you into legal hot water so take everything I said with a grain of salt and only try these stunts if you are SURE you can pull it off without getting into trouble. Note that I am not an attorney and this is not legal advice. Some of it is even downright unethical. But I am on my third scotch so frankly my dear…..
So here you go!:

  1. Demand a drug test especially if you suspect she/he will fail
  2. Use the kids as leverage
  3. Quit working and be conveniently physically or mentally unable to work
  4. Redistribute wealth as a pre-emptive strike
  5. Show up the domestic violence scam by challenging an order of protection and forcing the filer to prove the allegations (especially if you know you are innocent!)
  6. Shop hard and spend big before you file
  7. Get property transfer not alimony (tax consequences are better, I heard, though you should double check with an accountant)
  8. Hire a PI and get the dirt on him/her
  9. Do your own surveillance in the house and car (offices can be tricky)
  10. Change you will before you file
  11. Put stuff in trust for the kids but they can’t touch till they are 35. Make yourself the trustee.
  12. Scoop and snoop and copy all the documents you find in triplicate.
  13. Set up sting operations to uncover secret trysts.
  14. Liquidate your retirement accounts before you file
  15. Put spyware on the computer (this may not be admissible if it is a personal computer but if it is a family computer, maybe)
  16. Get friends and family to help you spy, set up and get the dirt on your spouse.
  17. Open foreign bank accounts and stash cash beyond the jurisdiction of your local court
  18. Get rid of your spouse’s attorney by claiming “conflict of interest.”
  19. Hire someone to seduce your spouse in a hotel room (or wherever) and get photos *
  20. Get the children to hate your soon to be ex so that you will win custody.*

I think the last two recommended “hard hitting tactics to use in divorce” are bad so I crossed them out. But you get the idea. These are some tactics I would consider to be “hard hitting.”
What do you think?
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