When your husband’s ex-wife refuses to butt out of your marriage what do you do?
If you are the wife of a certain public figure right now (who shall remain nameless), you may be asking yourself the very same question: what do I do with an ex-wife who refuses to stay in her place and leave me and my husband alone?
It seems not very unusual: some ex-wives continue to feel territorial towards their ex-husbands and they overstep their lane and they refuse to butt out and leave the new wife to her new family. It is especially hard when the husband refuses to sever ties with this woman and continue to solicit her advice and friendship while you are trying to bond with him and create your new memories and traditions. So it feels like there are “three of you in that marriage” which, as we can all imagine, must suck big time.
This is something, it seems, that happens to the best of women out there, in the very highest echelons of society, to include first ladies, princesses, executives and trophy wives of millionaires. As well as ordinary folk like you and me.
What is it about your husband’s ex-wife? Why won’t the witch step aside and let you have your moment? Why does she continue to try to rain on your parade and to ingratiate herself and draw attention to herself at your expense? And why does your husband refuse to put her back into her place? Why does he leave the dirty work to you so that you will look like you are the one who is jealous when clearly the ex-wife is the one with the problem?
It is unclear what the reason for this is. It is a very weird dynamic and it takes hold of people and it is the new wife who often bears the brunt of having to put up or shut up lest everybody calls her a green monster.
It so is not fair because if your husband would just act a certain way to his ex-wife, she would automatically know her place and this unpleasant situation would not even be an issue.
The key for the current wife is to remain poised and classy and not let the ex-wife get the best of her as she is often trying to do. Because if she truly meant no harm and was as “nice” as she pretends to be, the ex-wife would have enough class and sensitivity to step out of the way and not put the current wife in a bad position of having to assert her place in the new marriage and relationship.
There should be no triangulation of affection in this new marriage and the new wife should not have to put up with ridiculous antics from the old wife if the husband would simply…grow a backbone.